Tuesday, June 21, 2011

Chapter 2: Perfecting the Art

Chapter 2
Perfecting the Art


     Working as late into the night as I do, normally I don't wake up until after noon, about 1 most days. That means I get lunch for my breakfast. Mac-n-cheese is not my favorite, but I'll settle for it. Besides its really one of the only things I know how to cook. Too bad I burnt it today, maybe it's the stove.

     Since I've moved here, I feel the need to steal. Everyday. It's unavoidable. If I go a day without, I can't seem to sleep, and overall just feel horrible. So that being said, I think it's time to meet another neighbor or two. I spotted a big house on my way to work that looked like a good one. Actually it seems that two families live there, maybe it's a townhome.

     I stood outside and introduced myself to the owner. I was thankful it was a female, I have a way with girls. She invited me in before too long and offered to cook me dinner. I accepted, and while she was cooking I took a small tour of her home. A really nice place, filled with things. I'll have to come back here. That means this time I'll take something small. Less noticeable.

     I found myself actually having to use the restroom, not just pretending to have to. When I did, I noticed some wall Sconces. They were pretty cool, and I didn't have any lights in my kitchen just yet. Perfect. I took two. And also, what's cool about these, is I can hide them in my loose fitting sweater.

     Okay, time to go. Wait, she's cooking. Then I'll make it an eat and run date. I have to work tonight.

     Dinner was great actually. She made my favorite dish, not that she knew it. Tri-Tip Steak, yum. I'll definately have to come back here, even if it's just for dinner. Hey I'm not above 'stealing' a little food either!

     Late night, or maybe I should say late morning. The boss asked me to stay a while after work, and help our 'team' on a special mission. I didn't get home until about 5AM. Sleep till 2, get up. Do a little workout to keep up my strength and endurance.

     My shower really sucks. It's the cheapest one they had, but all I could afford. It's almost always cold, like the hot water pipe is busted. I'm not even close to a mechanic though, and wouldn't know how to fix it. I guess I'll just have to save up some money to get a better one.

     The money I do have saved up for now is going into my Shang Simla trip, I only need about §23 more to get it. I can accomplish that this evening, maybe I'll leave tonight.

     Spending the day at the pool is always a good way to relax. Even a hot shot, busy body like myself needs some time off. Although, it does seem like every time I get some chill time in, I always get that itch. Not that I don't on a regular basis, but when I just loaf all day it seems to be worse than when I work or something.

     When the sun started to set, I left the pool. As I walked out, I noticed an unoccupied car. Oh yeah. That got me thinking. Unfortunately there were way to many people around for me to be able to pull vehicle theft off here.

     Jogging helps me think, I have to plan. I'll jog home, or in that direction until I work something out.

     I did just that, came up with a plan. Actually a couple, because I passed an seemingly 'abandoned' car, a nice one. That would be a good target. It was right behind the bookstore, unfortunately there were a couple of guys hanging around in front of the store.

     I stood for a few minutes waiting. Hoping those men were just leaving. They didn't. I then noticed that the older of the two kept glancing at me, watching me. Did he suspect?

     Okay, so one way to do this and erase suspicion is to introduce myself. Walk up and shake his hand, no big deal right?
     His name was Cycl0n3. I think that's the first time I've remembered someones name. Normally when I'm 'in the zone' I don't care about names or people. Just getting my need fulfilled. Anyway, I'm assuming I remembered it because it is an odd name for a person.

     He said he was waiting for his wife to get off work. Damn. I'll have to leave. Okay on to plan B. Back to visit my townhome friends. I'll stop by home though and change clothes first.


     As I hoped, she remembered me and didn't hesitate to invite me inside. She offered dinner again, but I declined. We talked for a little bit, then she excused herself to the 'powder room'. Why do women call it that? Oh well, now is a good time.

     I needed something big, this was a great need tonight. Something small wasn't going to cut it. A bedroom! Those always have great things to take. This one was pretty empty though. Two mirrors, a bed, a silly kids painting and ... oh good. A dresser. That's perfect. I don't have one yet. There's a pretty good sized window here, I can get it out.

     Also, I remembered that §23 I needed to get my plane ticket. A lamp will do just fine, I can sell it as soon as I leave. Got it. Right out the window with the dresser. It'll be a tight squeeze getting this stuff in that small car, I really need something bigger. I'll have to scope around town for a truck or something.

Okay leaving, I have to get to the park before it's way to late and all my 'buyers' leave.

     I didn't know lamps were so in demand. If I had, maybe I would have taken two of them. I brought my goods to the park to sell, keeping the dresser, just selling the lamp. Anyway, there were 5 offers, I took the highest bidder at §38. That puts me over the top for my plane ticket.

     It couldn't get much better, if that woman living in the townhome did have any suspicions about me - by the time she came looking, I would be long gone. I called the airport, they have a flight going out tonight and a few seats open. I took one.


     So here I am in China, ready to hand over that package. I arrived in mid morning, pretty good flight. I found the guys house alright and introduced myself. Glancing around to make sure no one was watching I pushed the package into his hands. He smiled. I half hoped he would open it here, so I could see what it was. He didn't. Who would really?

     I called the airport to leave, but there wouldn't be a flight open for another 3 days. TWO DAYS?! Oh shit, okay well time off work is fine, but I wasn't sure about my thieving need.

     Since I have two days to waste here, I might as well try and stay busy. I think I'll visit the Halls of the Lost Army. They say it's awesome.


  1. The look on his face when he's casing the joint and then again when he spies the dresser--priceless! "Powder room. Why do women call it that?" ROFL :D

  2. Ummmm, wonder what might come up missing from the museum? :)